Meeeeowww.

My coworkers are dieting. They are bitching about how hungry they get between their properly portioned lunches and breakfasts.

It’s making me feel this strange mix of “Bitches, please: I didn’t eat for 60 hours straight this week,” and “Bitches, please: uh, please forgive me for being a bitch and feeling all superior to your NORMAL BIOLOGICAL PROCESSES.” 

?????

P.S. 124. Still fat. 

Updatez.

Man. Life really got to me over the past week, ya dig?

*~*NeWaYz*~* (that took way longer to type than I thought it should’ve. how much time did we waste doing that on AOL, y’all?! Oh, capricious youth!)

My weight as of Saturday morning was 125 on the dot. I forgot to do my measurements because of life and weekend morning mental fog. I’ll get around to it at some point. Probably.

Post.

After lamefast, my stats are as follows:

thighs: 20”
hips: 37” (i grew a big ol’ booty)
waist: 26”
tittaaaaays: 36”

weight: 127

No ketosis yet, dammit. But, I was jamming on mad carbs for a while there. I bet I’ll be in ketosizzzz by tomorrow morning. Positive thoughts. Hooray.

Numbers.

Oh, the numbers game. Shit’s ‘bout to get intense up in here: 

CW: 130 pounds (jesus!). 
LW: 96
HW: somewhere in the mid 140s? (also: jesus!) 
GW: 111

These are my measurements from when I was at 111 about three years ago:

thighs: 19”
hips: 34”
waist: 24”
tittaays: 32.5”

That sounds way better than where I’m at right now.

‘Sup

So, I weighed myself this morning.

130 pounds. 10 pounds up from the last time I weighed myself, like, a month ago.

Terrible.

I haven’t weighed that much in probably five years.

So, I have a plan:

• Get my ass the fuck into ketosis ASAP;
• Get my ass the fuck into regular exercise ASAP, and;
• Get my ass the fuck into a manageable and comfortable size using the above means. 

Easy-peasy. I hope.

I want to lose at least three pounds by this time next week. Keepin’ it riiiil. I used to be able to drop weight like nobody’s business. But, now I’m all old and shit. True story.